Double Bind Model

Goal of the Technique:

What is a Double Bind?

A double bind describes a special form of communication between two people. The sender of the message simultaneously delivers two contradictory messages—often on different levels, such as content and relationship—to the other person.

The receiver experiences this as a paradox. They may be unable to process the dilemma immediately—or at all. If they frequently find themselves in such conflict situations, especially when emotionally dependent on the sender, this can have psychologically harmful effects.

Origin of the Double Bind Theory – Palo Alto

In the mid-20th century, a group of psychiatrists, clinical/social psychologists, social workers, and communication researchers at the Mental Research Institute (MRI) of Palo Alto University explored the roots of communication disorders. A central question was: Is there a link between communication and mental illnesses such as schizophrenia?

Gregory Bateson (1904–1980), a university professor, was the initiator of this line of inquiry. Several of his students were among the founders of the so-called Palo Alto Group. Members included institute founder and financier Don D. Jackson, John Elderkin Bell, Jay Haley, Paul Watzlawick, Virginia Satir, and John Weakland. In 1956, the Double Bind Theory crystallized as a result of their work.

The researchers confirmed their hypothesis: repeated exposure of a child to extreme double bind situations could increase the risk of mental illness in adulthood. At a time dominated by material and physical approaches, the Palo Alto Group stood out with a theory based on mental and informational actions.

Bateson

The personal context in which Bateson developed the Double Bind Theory was unique:

Bateson thought in interdisciplinary and intercultural terms.

He was from England and lived as a young field researcher under modest conditions with the non-literate Iatmul people in New Guinea. He sought to understand their complex society using academic tools and documented aspects of their lives. In contrast to his own cultural values, he drew insights that became the basis of his doctoral thesis.

As a PhD in social anthropology, he lived in the U.S. from 1939 with his wife, the renowned anthropologist Margaret Mead.

Bateson applied diverse disciplines in his work: communication and systems theory, psychology, cybernetics, zoology, and ecology. He contributed to the foundations of systems theory via the Macy Conferences (1946–1953). Starting in 1974, he also exchanged ideas with the future founders of NLP during their early “Meta Model” project. Richard Bandler and John Grinder had been his former research assistant and student, respectively.

Examples of Double Binds

• Of course we’re a team. But I’m sure you’ll manage it alone.
• Surely you can manage to make a decent cup of coffee, right?
• I’ll be with you in just a moment.
• Love me—but not now.
• I love your hugs, but now I want to go online.
• I only did it for you.
• I love your gift.

Standard Steps

1. Problem: Double Bind + specific situation
2. Logical Levels
3. Resources
4. Anchoring
5. Test

Detailed Steps

1. Problem: Double Bind + specific situation

Identify a specific double bind situation (two conflicting messages leading to inaction) and the people involved.

“You want to work through a situation where you feel blocked because someone gives you two contradictory messages at the same time. Can you name a specific situation?”

Logical Levels

Identify on which logical levels both individuals are operating and how the double bind affects each of them. “On what level do you perceive the messages, or where do they block you? … On a behavioral level? … Or your skills? … Or on the level of what's important to you—your values?”

Resources

Find (kinesthetic) resources on a higher level (identity or spirituality) that allow you to step out of the system. “Can you find something positive and emotional that helps you become less susceptible to these double messages—or decide how you want to respond to each part of the message? … Maybe by becoming aware of who you are … or by recalling your connection to a larger system.”

Anchoring

Anchor the resource by creating a congruent (V.A.K.O.G.) representation and flowing it into the relationship and across the logical levels. (Support congruence with the anchor.) “Now let’s anchor the resource. … Step into it … How do you perceive yourself? … What do you see, hear, or say positively to yourself? … Feel how good it feels … maybe even smell or taste it. … your capabilities, your values, your identity … and your sense of belonging.”

Test

Conduct the test as soon as possible in real life—or at least mentally simulate it (Future Pacing). “How do you feel now when you think about the situation?” … “Can you imagine how you’ll react if this person—or someone else—sends double messages again?”