Meta-Mirror Version 1

The Meta-Mirror is about clarifying and positively transforming problematic inner and outer relationships. The term "Meta-Mirror" comes from the insight that a person’s behavior in difficult communication with another is a reflection of their own internal communication.

In the Meta-Mirror, the traditional three perceptual positions are expanded with a fourth, which Robert Dilts called the “meta mirror.” This is a meta-position in relation to the other three. From this meta-mirror position, you can observe the relationship pattern between the third and first positions—how internal parts (third position) communicate with the person's awareness (first position). Reflecting on this interaction serves as a “mirror” for how people treat themselves.

Bernd Isert developed a Meta-Mirror format based on Robert Dilts' work, focused on transforming undesirable social relationships by discovering and integrating resources while progressing through the logical levels.

Detailed Steps:

Conflict + Floor Anchors

From the meta-position, A identifies a conflict situation and places floor anchors for the 1st and 2nd perceptual positions.

“You want to work through a conflict with another person.” … “Could you please place two spots in the room—one for yourself and one for the person you're in conflict with?” (Note: These floor anchors represent the logical levels.)

First Position

A steps into their own position and experiences the situation associated.

“As you stand here now, how do you feel?” … “And how do you perceive the other person?” (Levels: environment and behavior)

Second Position

A steps into the other person’s position and associates into their experience.

“Now, stepping into their shoes, how do you feel (as them), and how do you perceive yourself (A) from this perspective?”

First Dissociation: Capability Level

A takes one step back from the overall situation to observe from the level of capabilities.

“As you look at both from the outside, what do you notice? … How do they relate to each other? What capabilities could each person benefit from in this situation?” (Optional: send resources)

Second Dissociation: Values Level

A steps back again to the level of values.

“From here, what do you think is important to each person? … What motivates their conflict?” … “What values or beliefs could ease or resolve the situation?” (Optional: send resources)

Third Dissociation: Identity Level

A takes another step back to the level of identity.

“From here, how do you think each person sees themselves? How do they define their role in the situation? What new self-understanding could help them?” (Optional: send resources)

Fourth Dissociation: Belonging Level

A steps further back to the level of belonging.

“What kind of belonging exists between them (family, professional, intellectual, spiritual)?” … “Is there something here that could support change?” (Optional: send resources)

Fifth Dissociation: Intuition

One more step back into the space of intuition.

“And from here, allow an intuitive resource to emerge from your unconscious—whatever that may be for you.”

Resources

A walks back through the levels to positions 1 and 2, experiencing the resources.

“Can you now send this final resource into all levels, including your own self-position?” … “Now return and feel the change on each level.” … “How do you now experience your self-position?”

Test

Evaluate the outcome of the process.

“How do you feel about the conflict now?”