Metaprogram: Direction of Attention: Self - Others

Does the person pay attention to the nonverbal behavior of others or to their own internal experience? This category indicates whether someone automatically perceives and responds to the body language and tone of others, or not.

Self:

Self-focused individuals show little emotion, even when they experience it. There is sometimes a delay between perceiving a stimulus and reacting to it. They behave as they believe is appropriate. They are only convinced by the content, not by the tone, body language, or rapport accompanying the statement. They struggle to build rapport because they don't notice others' body language and therefore miss many cues. Individuals with this pattern do not pick up on hints. They judge the quality of communication based on their own feelings. As a result, they are generally not very skilled in interpersonal communication. In the workplace, self-focused individuals are typically deployed as technical experts in areas where communication skills are not critical.

Others:

Others-focused individuals automatically and reflexively respond to the behavior of others. They are expressive within their culture and react with facial expressions, body movements, and vocal changes to others. They assess the quality of communication based on the reactions they consciously and unconsciously perceive in the other person. They have a good ability to build or maintain rapport, provided they also have other relevant patterns.

Research on the Pattern

Southwest Airlines found that 95% of all complaints came from 7% of the staff. As a result, they implemented a hiring test, focusing on whether someone is self-oriented or others-oriented, and only hired applicants from the latter group. Since this measure, the airline has had the fewest complaints in its history.

Statistical Distribution

Self 7%, Others 93%

Recognition in Conversation

Self: Lack of culturally appropriate reactions, such as nodding, "Hm-hm" etc., responds only to the content of what is said, does not pick up "the pencil dropped by someone else," does not notice or respond to your tonalities. Little or no facial expressions or variation in tone.

Others: Responds to both content and non-verbal aspects of communication, reacts with nodding, body movements, "hm-hm" etc., expressively (within their cultural norms).

Interaction

Self: Focus on content, use the criteria and Convincer channel and mode of the other person.

Others: Influenced by the quality of rapport.